I haven’t knitted anything lately except a cozy for Sammy, my iPod. I used a purple yarn that I bought in order to knit a squid hat for one of my online friends. (Incidentally, this squid hat pattern is bizarrely difficult to follow, but I vow to someday finish it. Preferably before my friend’s child turns 58.)

Anyway, I don’t know why I chose purple yarn for my cozy, because purple hasn’t been my favorite color since I was 11 and obsessed with unicorns, Espirit bags and jelly shoes.

But how can I explain this, then?

This is the tank top I knitted last year. With super heavy yarn. Yarn for a tank top. A tank top meant to be worn during the SUMMER.

Note to self: use brain more often.

This was the first garment I knitted. I worked laboriously on it, and when it came time to make the armhole decreases, I had to actually write out whether each stitch should be knitted or purled, because the stupid pattern had to LINE UP and if I was one stitch off, everything would be ruined. My brain ached from this pattern.

Also, my knitting needles gave me a splinter.

But I prevailed. I succeeded in making the armholes even, I made the side seams invisible and the thing actually looked like the pattern in the book.

I’ve haven’t worn it since.